There were two polarizing picks in the opening round of the NFL Draft, and both came from Alabama. The Rams selecting QB Ty Simpson at No. 13 has been well documented — and scrutinized.
But the other ‘Bama pick, offensive lineman Kadyn Proctor, is the one who we’re gonna dial in on today.
Proctor, who the Dolphins picked at No. 12, is, easily, the biggest specimen in this year’s draft. He’s a massive human being, standing at 6-foot-7 (please don’t make the dumb joke), and weighing a measly 352 pounds.
Now, I say “measly” because that’s actually lean for Proctor, who struggled to keep his weight in check under Nick Saban at Alabama. And by that, I mean he used to clock in at well over 400 pounds, which won’t translate well in the NFL.
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That’s why Proctor was such a polarizing pick by Miami. If he can keep the weight in check, he’s arguably the best lineman in the draft. But work ethic concerns, which Saban brought up earlier this week, have followed the kid for years.
He does have a couple things working for him, though. No. 1, the South Florida heat should help him stay in shape. I’ve lived here my whole life. You can’t walk to your car without looking like you just ran a half-marathon.
Proctor’s biggest asset, though? His diet, which is surprisingly simple for anyone looking to shed a few pounds before the summer:
“Not eating after 7 p.m. is probably the biggest thing, because you’re not giving your body enough time to digest,” he said Friday. “I found out when I don’t eat after 7 p.m., I come in, I have a good weigh-in and it just felt good.”
Amen, brother! As a former fat guy myself whose parents once got a note from the doctor saying I was measuring at an alarming percentile, I can relate. This is the key. Stop eating so late at night. Have an early dinner, and shut it down when the sun goes down.
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No late-night snacks. No ice cream. No sneaking to the pantry between “King of Queens” commercials and grabbing a handful of granola. Don’t even look at the fridge after 7 p.m., unless you’re getting ice for your whiskey. That’s it. That’s the simplest way to start losing weight.
Oh yeah, and no donuts!
First off, “Krispy” is an elite nickname. Now, it’s not great if you’re an athlete, but whatever. Solid nickname. Not sure Proctor wants it to stick in the NFL, but I’ve certainly heard worse.
Sure, you need to eat better. Duh. You should mix in a salad every once in a while, and maybe go on a run a few times a week.
But, if you’re looking for somewhere to start, this is it. Stop stuffing your face at night, and you’ll be amazed at the results. That includes beer, by the way. I know, that one is tough, but those calories count just the same.
Anyway, good for Proctor. As a Dolphins fan, I love this kid. Listen to that honesty. You don’t get that nowadays. He hates walking on the treadmill. Who doesn’t? It’s the worst. So, he’s figured out a loophole, and it’s working for him.
Adapt or die, folks. It’s the name of the game.
Can’t wait to see this demon pancaking people on Sundays.
