{"id":76793,"date":"2023-08-19T10:00:48","date_gmt":"2023-08-19T14:00:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cablemanpro.com\/wallstreetpr\/im-a-mom-who-left-it-all-on-the-field-raising-my-sons-and-i-cant-stop-smiling-and-crying-76793"},"modified":"2023-08-19T10:00:48","modified_gmt":"2023-08-19T14:00:48","slug":"im-a-mom-who-left-it-all-on-the-field-raising-my-sons-and-i-cant-stop-smiling-and-crying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cablemanpro.com\/wallstreetpr\/im-a-mom-who-left-it-all-on-the-field-raising-my-sons-and-i-cant-stop-smiling-and-crying-76793","title":{"rendered":"I’m a mom who left it all on the field raising my sons and I can’t stop smiling and crying"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

I thought I was ready to drop our firstborn off at college.<\/a> <\/p>\n

At the beginning of his senior year I started collecting kisses.<\/a> Whenever he\u2019d walk through the kitchen on his way out the door to school, or on his way back in from practice, I\u2019d point to my forehead or my cheek and ask, “Please give your mama an extra kiss.” I guess I needed to pretend those kisses would hold me after he left for college. <\/p>\n

I also thought I<\/i> was ready because he\u2019s<\/i> ready. It feels good and right to watch the boy you birthed launch into the next chapter of his life with a good head on his shoulders and a firm foundation under his feet. Yes, he\u2019s ready. <\/p>\n

PRESIDENTS OF 13 UNIVERSITIES ELEVATE FREE SPEECH ON THEIR CAMPUSES AHEAD OF ACADEMIC YEAR<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n

But it\u2019s been three days since we hugged him goodbye in front of his dorm and my face has stayed wet with tears. I wasn\u2019t ready. <\/p>\n

This isn\u2019t a feeling anyone can prepare you for. Even a year full of extra kisses won\u2019t keep the tears at bay. It\u2019s a strange thing to feel so many conflicting emotions. Excitement, grief, happiness, loss, pain, pride, peace, longing for more time and looking forward to all that\u2019s ahead \u2013 these emotions make me feel OK and not OK all at once. <\/p>\n

I\u2019m grateful we have complete peace about the place he\u2019s chosen to spend the next four (or let\u2019s be honest, five) years. He\u2019s an Auburn man now, and we couldn\u2019t be prouder of who he\u2019s become. But good grief I am going to deeply miss his daily presence! I think that\u2019s the primary source of pain. The dailyness of his presence. <\/p>\n

I\u2019ll miss the daily texts, communicating about the little things like “When will you be home from practice?” or “What sounds good for dinner?” I\u2019ll miss the daily soundbites I\u2019d get about his day when he\u2019d collapse on the couch after a long day. I\u2019ll miss that feeling of relief that washes over me when he pulls into the driveway, knowing he\u2019s home safely. Oh, how I\u2019ll miss the nightly “I love you mama” he\u2019d warmly say as I\u2019d head up to bed long before him. <\/p>\n

All of this I will deeply miss while I also look forward with hopeful expectation to what\u2019s next for him. Now we get to watch him navigate young adulthood and fulfill his hunger for purpose and meaning with all the seeds we\u2019ve planted and all the tools we\u2019ve offered.\u00a0<\/p>\n

A few hours after we began the long drive home from Auburn, my phone chimed with a text from a good friend. She knows me well, and she knew this day would not be easy. <\/p>\n

“How ya doing, mama?”\u00a0<\/p>\n

I replied by explaining how my eyes were puffy and swollen since we\u2019d said goodbye to our son just a few hours earlier. “I\u2019m just going to miss him so much.”\u00a0<\/p>\n

Her response was simple but profound. “You left it all on the field!” Just one sentence that not only comforted me in my grief but gave me understanding for why I feel like I feel.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I left it all on the field. That\u2019s why I\u2019m OK and not OK. I was all in. I wasn\u2019t lost in him or his life. I just played with my whole heart. I gave him everything I\u2019ve got. I always will.\u00a0<\/p>\n

As a mom of five boys, all of whom play sports, this analogy makes sense to me.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Leaving it all on the field doesn\u2019t mean I played perfectly. I didn\u2019t, not by any stretch. I dropped the ball a lot, even fumbled it at times. I\u2019m OK with that. That\u2019s part of the game. We make mistakes and ask for forgiveness and learn from the failure and get back in the game. <\/p>\n

But sometimes I caught the ball, even got a first down. Occasionally I scored a touchdown. We were, and will remain, a great team. <\/p>\n

When I\u2019m tempted to ruminate on what I would have done differently as his mom, I will return to this idea that I left it all on the field. <\/p>\n

This doesn\u2019t mean my identity was tied up in being his mom. It wasn\u2019t. My identity is in being an unconditionally loved child of God.<\/a> I know that no child can or should carry the burden of being the place their parents find their value and worth. <\/p>\n

This also doesn\u2019t mean I needed him to succeed in school or sports because that meant I succeeded as a mom. His success, nor his struggles, are a statement about how well I did or didn\u2019t do as a mom. <\/p>\n

I know this: What I get right and what I get wrong does not determine who my child becomes. Yes, I play a vital role in his life. My words and actions matter greatly. But God\u2019s sovereignty over my son\u2019s life supersedes my significance in his life. What I\u2019ve done is significant. But what God can do is supreme. And His wild grace covers us both! <\/p>\n

Also, this is a team sport, so I can\u2019t take any credit for my son\u2019s strong character and humble confidence. His dad, his brothers, his grandparents and extended family, his coaches, our church community and close friends were all on the field too. And they were extraordinary.\u00a0<\/p>\n

But more than anything, God was our coach. He\u2019s our leader and He held us together. And for all the things I got wrong, this is one thing I got right – I left it all on the field and I entrusted the outcome of our effort to God. I trusted God with the son He entrusted to me. God knows what my son needs in this next season. He loves my son in ways I can\u2019t comprehend. He has a plan for my son that is better and bigger than what I often felt pressure to orchestrate for him.\u00a0<\/p>\n

CLICK HERE FOR MORE FOX NEWS OPINION<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0<\/p>\n

Friends who have gone before me in sending their kids to college have told me that, over time, releasing them gets easier, and the relationship gets better. That gives me hope! I\u2019m choosing to believe they\u2019re right as I grieve what\u2019s gone.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I should also mention this isn\u2019t my first college drop off. See, four years ago we welcomed a young man from Haiti into our family. He grew up at Danita\u2019s Children\u2019s Home in Haiti, and we\u2019d gotten to know him through our many visits to the orphanage, so when he graduated from high school in Haiti, we brought him to the states, welcomed him into our family, and sent him to college. <\/p>\n

So, there was nobody to grieve and nothing to which we needed to say goodbye. My husband and I only felt anticipation for his future and gratitude for another wonderful son to love. Andre\u2019s now preparing to graduate from Lipscomb University, and we are partnering with him to launch a nonprofit that will provide similar educational opportunities for his brothers and sisters still at the orphanage in Haiti. We couldn\u2019t be prouder of the young man he\u2019s become!\u00a0<\/p>\n

So maybe I am<\/i> ready, and this strange mix of happy\/sad isn\u2019t a bad thing. <\/p>\n

I\u2019m no longer on the field with my firstborn son, but I\u2019ll be cheering wildly from the stands\u00a0\u2013\u00a0and praying harder than ever \u2013\u00a0as he embarks on this journey. I\u2019ll just be doing it with puffy swollen eyes for a while. I think that\u2019s what\u2019s supposed to happen when you leave it all on the field, which I still have the honor of doing with my three boys still at home.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0CLICK HERE TO READ MORE FROM JEANNIE CUNNION<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Source – https:\/\/www.foxnews.com\/opinion\/mom-left-field-raising-sons-cant-stop-smiling-crying <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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